Saturday, May 10, 2014

Slowing down


1. a slowing down or delay in progress, action, etc.

My soul has been heavy these last months. Tired. Confused. Restless. Stressed. I think we all have times in our life and during our walk with our Creator where these times happen. Why? Is it so we can dig deep enough to change something He wants us too?

Why yes, He whispers.

Yes, sweet child of mine it is.

He was telling me this.

"Molly, you must slow down to hear me."

Did I listen?

No, in fact I kept going with the pressures and busyness of  life in what are culture says we "have to do." I became even more restless and stressed, I needed to keep going so I wouldn't have to listen. Guess what!? I don't do this well.

Heaviness set in.

No longer could I keep busy. I had to slow down.

Humor me. It's easy for us to ask our kids "Listen to me!" "Would you slow down and listen to me!" I find myself asking my kids, "give me your eyes and listen to me!"  Funny thing is God was asking me the same thing.  We expect our children to stop and listen, yet I can't do this for God?

After weeks of gently tugging at me, I had become stressed out enough in life that finally I just threw my hands up in the air and said "ok you got me! I will listen."

You know what!?

He was telling me slow down!

What matters? Money? Sports? Hustle and bustle of going here, there and everywhere!? No, it's slowing down taking in those moments of life around me.

Fast forward 3 months. I was on a plane alone bound for Florida. No kids. No husband. Me, a dark night and a red eye flight. 7 days with sweet dear friends. God knew. Pressing. Digging and searching began. He spoke to my soul. I was about to have seven days to really seek God in this next stage of life of having three kids in school, new home, relationships with friends, community and how that is suppose to look. He was asking me to take a step back from the busyness and truly focus on our family and home. It was so refreshing to take a deep breath from the busyness of life...the go, go, go, go mentality was tiring.  I realized it's easy for me to get caught up in what "others" want me doing. This was something I needed to work on. I needed to stop. Really think about what God wanted me doing. Not others.

It is by no accident that God brings certain people into our lives at certain times. He can truly use them to speak to us. The question is do you listen? Do you really stop and listen?  I am so thankful and blessed by my trip. God used a very special women to speak into me. God used her by example in her actions and through deep talks that it's ok to go at a pace I can handle. He used her to show me to soak up what's in front of me, that I need to take it day to day. Not to over commit. To focus on most importantly my relationship with Jesus. To soak Him up on a daily basis to get through those busy days. That I need those intimate relationships and friendships to get through this thing we call "life." I realized if I kept moving through life at this speed and was not willing to slow down and appreciate life, I was going to miss out on what God had in store for me.

I won't lie, this is a huge challenge for me. I have to strategically think through my week and sometimes down to the day to not get "caught up" and "over commit" in the hustle and bustle of life around me. I am constantly waiting on Him to guide me on this Journey we call life.

Thank You Jesus, for being patient with me and showing me how to slow down.

I was very blessed to be able to go spend seven beautifully warm, sunny days on the beaches of Florida slowing down, seeking Him and waiting on Him to speak to me.

The LORD is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh Him. – Lamentations 3:25

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Amazing Grace, How Sweet the Sound

I will not fear March. I tell myself this every year. Do you know those times when God is speaking to you through everything you see in your day? I have been having that over the last couple months. It is in anticipation for what is to come. Mourning...loss...a hurting heart. March rolls around and I dread it. A long looming, grey month for me. I see flowers blooming, trees budding, longer days, spring sunsets, snow melting, but for me, still, a grey and looming month. I dread it every year. It passes ever so slowly. In fact, sometimes I wish I could go to sleep March 1st and wake up April 1st.

10 years ago, I was pregnant with our second baby, awaiting a summer birth. I loved feeling her little kicks and hiccups. Around this time we found out our sweet baby girl had quietly passed into the arms of Jesus. This was one of the hardest things to experience. To know we would never hear her first cry, see her crawl, walk or talk.

I questioned God's plan. With every being of me...struggling to keep my head above water...why would He bring us to this place. I was at one of my lowest points I can ever remember being.

God brought me to this and He was the only one that was going to get me through it.

I so desperately needed Him.

He carried me through those water's I thought I wouldn't get through. His love was and always will be.

Even though March is hard, he brings me healing in the pain.

A Journey.

A new understanding of my Faith.


with every passing year it get's a little better.

New life...a time for healing.

He restored my soul. He was healing in my pain. He was my shelter in the storm.

Amazing Grace how sweet the sound...

I hear you singing over me...

It's a beautiful sound....

Hallelujah, you restored my soul.

Mackenzie Faith March 26, 2004